happy anniversary to me

Today marks the two-year anniversary of my first day in Japan.

Two years! And I'll be staying at least one more. A few days ago I signed my contract for my third year. I'm locked in.

-Warning, the following is just a personal statement of justification-

My feelings about the whole thing are mixed. The fact is, I would have to leave my job and apartment and life in Tokamachi today if I hadn't recontracted. And it feels good to know that I am not ready for that yet. Had I decided to stop JET, my experiences here would be cut short. I wouldn't have had that crazy weekend in Tokyo and Yokohama. I wouldn't have eaten that world class sushi for lunch today. I wouldn't have had a rural onsen after work. I won't have had all the awesome things I will do over the next year. I won't have had the opportunity to see the strange beauty and culture and language and humor that I see everyday. And my income would have stopped.

But of course I'm missing home, and it's been far too long since I've been home and seen that familiar beauty and culture and language and humor. I'll get home soon for a visit but my mind gets distracted with wanting another trip to Thailand or Hawaii or Okinawa where I can do the beach thing but see Tim and Susie and my sister and see Zen and Rain, or go somewhere new like China or Vietnam. By staying, I've given myself the opportunity to go all of these places. And I wouldn't be happy knowing that if I left I wouldn't have the money or location or job or schedule that gives me the space to do all this.

But of course my heart aches for things and people in New Mexico. The people and life and places back home haven't been forgotten. If anything, I'm more aware of them now than I ever was. In fact, I think people around here might be tired of hearing me brag about them...

But I'm really quite enjoying extending my young 20's as long as I can. Don't worry though, I'll know if and when my time is up. I won't be 'that guy'.

How long will I stay here though? Longer than one more year? Your guess is as good as mine. When I came, I only thought it would be a year. Now it's three.

Does this make me an ex-pat? I don't think I'm at that point...yet.